Bullying at School

Bullying can happen to almost anyone. Almost 8 out of every 10 children in United Kingdom are victims of bullying. In 1999, an anti-bullying policy was enforced in schools across Britain. Everything was done to prevent bullying problems from taking place. Sadly, the problem still continues today.

If you are between the ages of 11-18 or are the parents of children in this age group, then you will find this article useful.

A great deal of bullying takes place in the school or on the playground and unfortunately in more cases than not, the same school bullies become workplace bullies later on in life. Since there is such a high incidence of bullying, more and more people are deciding to educate their children at home to avoid any such incidents.

Every year hundreds of children all over the world commit suicide because they are victims of terrible bullying. These children would rather die than face yet another day of being tormented and teased. Most children however, are more fortunate than this and manage to get help in time.

What is bullying?
Bullying is a form of aggressive and cruel behaviour that expresses itself in various forms - it can be racial bullying, teasing, calling someone names, or continuously harassing someone. Children get bullied because they might look different or sound different. Your child might be a victim of bullying if they are continuously subjected to:

• Physical abuse like being pushed, attacked, subject to degrading behaviour.
• Mental abuse like being called names or being threatened.
• Having personal belongings taken from them against their will.
• Being deliberately ignored and made fun of.

How do you know that your child is being bullied?
It is not always easy to tell if your child is being bullied. Some symptoms that parents should look out for are:

• Your child getting extremely upset at the thought of going to school.
• Your child may say that he/she feels too ‘unwell’ to attend school every day - this is a frequently used excuse and one that works, as most parents would prefer to let their child stay at home than send them to school if they’re unwell.
• Change in the usual behaviour pattern of your child - he/she might become very quiet, resentful and be more demanding of your time.
• They might have cuts and bruises.

What to do if your child is being bullied?

Whatever age your children are, it is good for them to know that you are there for them to talk to should the need arise.
You may find that victims of bullying are not likely to want to ‘squeal’ on the bullies for fear of what the bullies might do to them if they find out.
If other students in the school are bullying your child, the school needs to take responsibility to try to actively sort this problem out.
Encourage your child to talk to the teacher about the problem.
In addition, you should definitely talk to the teacher as well.
Make sure that you when you talk to the teacher, you address the issue in as calm a way as possible. It is natural to feel extremely angry but there isn’t any point in being confrontational with the teacher. Discuss the problem and try to come to a resolution.
Document all incidents of bullying with dates and times.
If the meeting with the teacher is not as productive as you wanted, speak to the Head teacher of the school.
Your child should feel safe at school and in the school playground - are there enough supervisors in the playground? If the school cannot afford more supervisors, maybe some parents could volunteer a bit of their time.
Sometimes the bullying takes place out of school hours and not necessarily by students at the same school - in such a situation, if possible, it might be an idea to talk to the parents of the bullies and get them to co-operate in finding a solution. Parents are sometimes reluctant to speak to other parents but you have to decide what is important - sorting out the problem or letting your child continue to suffer.
Parents of children being bullied should get together and form a group - PAB (Parents against bullying).
There is no compromise with bullies or the act bullying- there is absolutely no justification for bullying. Bullies are cowards who operate in groups, as they are too scared to face up to a situation or to pick on someone their own size and age.

Tips for kids who are being bullied

• Don’t ever blame yourself for getting bullied.
• Learn to say NO to the bully.
• Tell someone as soon as you get bullied - maybe tell a friend and an adult like a teacher or your parents. Don’t worry, you are not telling tales.
• Don’t wander off alone as far as you can help it - stay in a group.
• You have a right to feel safe so don’t let the bully get the better of you.

Who else can help with bullying?
No one deserves to be bullied and no one should have to put up with it. There are many websites that deal with the issue, visit:

http://www.bullying.co.uk

Other places that can offer some help and advice are Childline on 0800 11111 or Kidscape on 0207 730 3300 or the anti-bullying campaign on 0207 3781446.

Bullying is one of those problems that won’t go away overnight, but work at it and don't let the bully win.

Links to useful sites related to bullying.
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